He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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