using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Crop dusting thru forever 21
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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