Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
the night ended with taco bell and tears
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
