So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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