there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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