i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
