Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Someone shattered a urinal.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize
