He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
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You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
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He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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