Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
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