He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize