Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
You were trust falling into bushes
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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