Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
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