Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize
