My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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