Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
