Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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