Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
