I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
