I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize
