I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
