so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize