is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
