This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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