she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
