Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
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Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
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There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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