So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
