I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
