i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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