I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
