Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
