Whatcha textin bout Willis?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
