yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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