They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Randomize
