I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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