fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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