Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Randomize