This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize
