Your tits are I can't wait for
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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