I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Randomize
