I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
