What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
