What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
he was CRYING into my vagina
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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