Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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