I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize