how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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