everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
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