You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
