Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
