She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
