What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
time to smoke my breakfast
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
