I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Randomize
